Tesla's Pigeons

...the story of a scientist racing to join the Martian science colony before the Earth's governments shut down civilan space travel and press the best mind left on the planet into creating new superweapons.

Monday, November 08, 2004

Day 8, and Here's a Poll

Total Word Count: 6,767. Getting back on track. Writing is becoming easier, and how did I ever live without a jump drive?

Todays excerpt comes from near the end.

She walked up to the Spaceport gates, met by another security guard, less ill-tempered looking than the fed border guards.
“Name?”
“Jo Hagel“
The guard scanned his list.
“I don’t see you on the list.”
“It might be under Josephine.”
“No. No Hagel on the list.”
“I must be on the list. Dr. Williams made all the arrangements himself.”
The guards eyes shifted. “Follow me.”
He motioned for another guard to take his place at the gate and led her across the compound to the main administrative building. Inside, he took her down a long corridor past several solid, windowless doors, and into a tiny equally windowless room.
“Make yourself comfortable.”
The room had two couches facing each other with a low table between. On the table were two cups, upside-down, and a pitcher of water. She arranged herself on one of the couches and poured herself a glass of water. The pitcher was an unbreakable polymer. Other than that, the room was bare; devoid of anything to occupy her time or mind, other that wondering what was going on.

After what seemed like forever, one of the doors opened—not the one she had come in through. A tall man entered, who must have been picked for whatever he was about to do based entirely on how intimidating he looked walking into a room. He was a huge mass of human being, and bald—she wondered to herself why since time began tough guys were always bald, but they were. He looked her over, crossed to the other sofa and sat down facing her without saying a word. He poured a glass of water and drank it before speaking.
“Josephine Hagel.” It was not a question.
“Yes.”
“Do you mind telling me what you’re doing here?”
“Dr. Williams messaged me from the Martian Station last week. He said he’d arranged passage for me to the station out of the Sonoran Spaceport. All I had to do was be here. So I’m here. Who are you?”
“That’s not important.
“Is there a problem? Dr. Williams said everything would be in order by the time I arrived.”


So here's the poll. I'm a little torn about where to take the ending. I've whittled down to three options:
A. Jo gets off the planet
B. Dr. Williams doesn't really exist; the person she's been communicating with is a covert fed operative who is luring her to Yuma to provide a cover for her disappearance.
C. Dr. Williams exists, but has no standing to have authorized her passage off world (at which point we're left with the decision, does she manage to get on the ship or is she stuck on Earth continuing to flee from the feds?)

Please weigh in with your choice as to which would make the best ending.

2 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

C. Then you have room for a sequel when you publish it and become famous...more famous than that lady with the kids clamoring after her to write more books!

11:44 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

How about...

D) Jo superglues herself to the sofa and is stuck in The Bland Room forever?

Ok, Ok, I go with a twist on B), you could really run with that, especially as panic sets in. -Larry "Mr. Grooism" Steller

12:07 AM  

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